Conceeding

 Today, I walked away (literally and figuratively) from my toxic codependent love.    This isn't the first time.  This time might not stick as it's been done many times in two and a half years.  Today felt different though he seemed to be pushing it and when I couldn't help it and admitted defeat against versions of myself that he cultivated and preferred in his own head... The worst versions of me... Inaccurate versions... I conceded that battle and walked away. 

I didn't cry at first.  It wasn't until I was alone hours later I cried.  But I know it wouldn't improve.  And it was dangerous when it was at its existing worst. 

I'm mourning the him I wish he could be.  

Day 1....  Hello.